It’s the Journey, not the Destination

Another ride with my bike club this weekend. This time we chose to go to southern Minnesota and northern Iowa. The plan was to choose a closer destination so we could spend our time riding the back roads, instead of having to drive the main highways in order to make the miles to get to our destination.

Of course, riding this way took a lot more time to get to our destination. But, I gotta tell you, the ride was exactly what motorcycling is all about for me. For me, there is nothing more boring than mile after mile of “bombing” down a 4-lane highway and staying out of the fray of cars and trucks all racing to their destination, especially when leading a pack of motorcycles. When leading a pack, you’re making decisions for the whole pack, not just you and your bike. It can be pretty intense at times.

So, while we were riding the back roads, I realized that even though I was leading a pack I was totally into my ride and thoroughly enjoying it. It occurred to me once again that riding my bike was more about the journey, not the destination. The destination is just an excuse to ride. A friend of mine in the group always says that riding his bike is his psychiatrist. It’s really true. When you get into your ride, nothing else exists and it often becomes the peace and clarity we search for in our minds. It’s something special. As I rode and reflected on the peace of our journey on the back roads, it occurred to me once again, that focusing on the journey, not the destination brings about a sense of being one with my world. I thought about the parallel of riding to my life’s journey. Realistically our destination in life from birth is ultimately passing on out of this world and as I see it, it all comes back to what we do on our journey. Yes, we have goals and plans for what we’re doing on our journeys. We have a drive to somehow succeed in our lives, whatever that success means to us. I’ve had many goals over the years and reached some of them. But, I’ve come to believe that my greatest goal in life is that elusive peace and calm in my heart where I can be my best in whatever I do. It doesn’t really matter what I achieve, which path I take, as long as I do it the best I can with love for myself and others. The material goals of a career, home, toys, etc. mean nothing if I’m not loving and enjoying myself and others in my life. Those connections we make, lovers, friends, children are what gives meaning to my life.

Not to say I’ve lived a perfect life, but I’ve lived it the best I know how. Life happens and it’s not always what we want. But it’s my choice as to how I traverse the obstacles of life. Even with the wrong turns, some bad decisions, some good decisions, there is always an opportunity to learn, grow and move on.

I haven’t been liking the particular path I’m on lately. But it is the path I chose a long time ago…having my sons and being married to the love of my life. There’s been a lot of ups and downs, times when I wanted out, times when I was so grateful for the life I’m living and often the pure joy of living with people I love. But, sometimes the path is littered with pain and suffering, sometimes of my own making, but often brought about by events outside of my control. Dealing with chronic pain while losing my son to alcoholism and slowly losing my husband to Alzheimer’s is not what I envisioned this part of my life to be. But, it doesn’t really matter what challenges I have faced on my journey thus far, all that matters is that I’m riding my journey the best I can. My journey through life will continue without them and probably with more pain as I age, but again, it doesn’t matter. I will carry them in my heart as I continue my journey. To me it’s all about what’s around that next corner. Whether I’m on my bike, pushing that corner, or pushing the corners in my life, it’s always exciting to me to see what is around that corner. If I don’t like it, I always can choose another turn.

On this particular ride, I was simply following the GPS, avoiding highways and making all kinds of turns on the back roads to get where we were going. After the first couple turns, I no longer had a clue where I was, whether I was headed south, east, west or north. I had no perspective of the larger picture of where I was in relation to the route we were taking. I just relied on the GPS to get me to where I was going and sat back and enjoyed the ride. Every once in a while, I would miss a turn or choose not to go down the gravel road the route wanted me to turn on. I just kept on riding and let the GPS re-route me to my destination. Since I was leading the pack, it was always my choice to follow the directions, or not. It was my responsibility as the Road Captain to ensure we got to where we were going safely while enjoying our ride. Construction, detours, gravel roads, some roads in pretty tough shape, debris on the road all a part of the ride. Navigating it successfully and enjoying the good roads, scenery and observing life in the small towns we rolled through, and oh, those curves were the best. Reaching our destination right on time to check into the beautiful cabin we rented for the weekend made the journey very successful in spite of the challenges. When we got off our bikes, everyone commented on what a good ride we had. It seemed to me that the experience of riding the back roads was a cool metaphor for living my life. It’s all about the journey.

As we were settling into the cabin I noticed a sign that was hanging in the hallway. It was a perfect signal of what I had been thinking about during the ride. “Life is a Journey” says it all.

I have no idea where the next path I take in my life journey will take me, but I’m looking forward to it all, wherever it takes me or what happens along the way. It’s all about living that journey the best I can, enjoying every moment of the life I have left in me.

Ride On…

Chick